Dust Wars
From Aspen Hill, Maryland, USA
"Dust Wars" can have multiple interpretations.
Contents |
Possible Explanations
Perhaps it's a pack of intentionally deluded people acting out of what is effectively insanity; there are indeed quite a lot of outpatients who live here to take advantage of low-cost housing.
Perhaps it's politically motivated. Perhaps it's spies. Perhaps it's motivated by racism or religion. Perhaps it's personal in some cases, but mostly it appears to be fairly random.
Whatever the case, it usually takes the form of people flinging noxious substances out of the open windows of their cars, into the open windows of oncoming vehicles.
This is Plausibly Deniable and exceptionally difficult to detect or prosecute. It used to be fairly commonplace on occasion down in the District of Columbia in the late 1980s. Generally that was either harassment or provocation, although in some instances the intention was to coat a target for surveillance with a very fine powder which was florescent as viewed through special equipment and illuminated with ultraviolet light.
The best way to deal with this, of course, is to contact Homeland Security and tell them you've just noticed criminal illegal aliens spreading around some sort of noxious powder. Then remind them about the Anthrax Attack and also remind them that Al Qaeda is known to have been aggressively seeking to acquire allies already entrenched in US society.
Yearly Occurances
2008
June
First observed instance of an escalating dust war this year was 2008 June 17 at approximately 1520 hours. Multiple vehicles, drivers of all ethnicities and both sexes, all along the heavy commuting routes of Bauer Drive, Parkland Drive, Heathfield Road, and Aspen Hill Road.
2008 June 18, seems mostly abated as of noon. Let's be sure not to Cry Wolf.
2008 June 20, still ongoing but generally limited to a fairly small number of participants. Interestingly, the people who are still at it seem to have a sort of uniform. A variety of vehicles seem to be in play. Most of these tend to be late 1990s or early 2000s small import cars, such as Honda Civic, Nissan Sentra, etc., though at least one silver/gray Lexus is in play, as well as some fairly distinctive full size Jeep SUV (Cherokee etc.) The one thing most seem to have in common is a black baseball cap with white or silver lettering. There may be a relative few actors in this sharing a fairly large pool of vehicles. Both the vehicles and the people driving them seem to be fairly recent arrivals to the neighborhood, so this could be some sort of off-season college prank. Most participants seem to be in that collegiate or immediately post-collegiate age range of about late teens to mid 20s. The way these things go, in the next few weeks the phenomenon will "morph", and it might be exclusively older folks.
A tentative theory is that the original phase was a wave of people passing through trying to muddy some trails behind them, comparable to leading a pursuer across a colony of red ants. The first person doesn't much get stung but everyone following will be stepping into a pile of jumbo anguish. Under this theory, what's going on right now is, by analogy, angry ants biting each other because there's nothing else to bite and the perpetrator of their ire is long gone.
2008 June 27, mostly this has died down, though some incidents continue to occur. As expected, this has morphed into a phase evidently striving to operate outside of previous description. It seems to be mostly some sort of ethnic thing right about now, mostly coming from middle-aged native-americans with the same sort of features as Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chavez. Although speculation is ultimately useless, it wouldn't be going too far to think of this as a sort of "quality of life/denial of services attack", to use an internet paradigm. One might also tend to be reminded of the tale of "Cadmus and the Dragon's Teeth".
2008 June 30, there's simply no point in discussing this anymore. Visitors to the area simply need to keep in mind that the place is overrun with factions of people whose main weapon appears to be surrealism imposed on the unsuspecting to the point of inducing madness or dusting with noxious or psychoactive chemicals until it's impossible to distinguish what is the nature of reality or what is happening within reality. Tourists are advised to select other destinations than anyplace in the vicinity of the Greater Washington DC Metropolitan Area. In particular, both tourists and businesspersons are advised in the strongest possible terms to under no circumstances set foot in, or do business in, Montgomery County in general and Aspen Hill and environs in particular.
My experiences in the past all point to the one thing that is known to work: Starve them out and make them spend every last resource as they starve.
Interesting note on translation: "paranoid" means "onto us".
Deszinformatiya is the best weapons these goddamn communists hereabouts have remaining to them.
2007
First observed instances were right after the end of the school year, and continued throughout the summertime to at least the end of August.
